I like to advise people on the topic of coping with difficult people at work because we’ve all been there and inevitably will be there again.  In most cases, I recommend that you confront the problem head on and talk about it with the person who is giving you agida.  In the event that you are experiencing true abuse, though, it might make sense to tell someone in a position of authority.  You shouldn’t do this lightly – for it could cause you more harm than good politically.  But if you believe this to be the right course of action, employment researchers at Arizona State University  suggest tactics for reporting office bullying, which is defined as exclusion and isolation, nitpicking, criticism, humiliation and even hitting.  They include:

1)       Be rational: Tell your story in a linear fashion and explain why you think the events occurred as they did.

2)       Express emotions appropriately:  Use similes and metaphors to describe how the bullying made you feel (e.g. I felt like I had a Kick Me sign on my forehead) while speaking in a calm and reasonable tone.

3)       Provide consistent details:  The more specifics you offer, the more credible you’ll be.  And be careful not to exaggerate or change your story over time.

4)       Offer a plausible story:  Reference or provide published literature about workplace bullying, and focus on the aspects of your experience that will be most believable to the listener.

5)       Be relevant: From a legal viewpoint, the only thing the listener cares about is the bully’s bad behavior and, to a lesser extent, your behavior.  The fact that you feel an injustice has been committed is less relevant.

6)       Emphasize your own competence:  Doing so helps establish the fact that the bullying is not a result of poor performance on the job and reinforces that you are not a “problem employee.”

7)       Show consideration for other perspectives:  Show that you’ve tried to understand where the bully is coming from, and that you’re not looking to be perceived as a whiner by the listener or others. 

This is merely a snapshot of the great tips available in the Arizona white paper.  Check it out when you have a chance.  It’s the kind of thing that can’t hurt to have in your back pocket.